How can I make friends with someone
What do friendships have to do with psychology?
At the same time in the same place
Scientists at the University of Leipzig have found out: The most important reason why we develop a relationship with a person is very banal - he is straight happened to be near us. For example, he sits down next to us on the train, moves into the neighboring apartment or attends the same Nordic walking course. Whether it is coincidence or fate - everyone can decide for themselves.
Friendship and Psychology: Equal and Equal?
No, the same and the same do not have to like to join. When it comes to female friendships, psychology says: Most of the time, our best friend isn't that much like us. And that's good. Because two mentality twins get bored of each other quickly. A different character, however shows us the world from another side. What we often have in common, however, are the level of education, age and income. This is not surprising, because it is such similarities that make it possible to meet at all.
The reunion is a pleasure
Whether we really make friends with someone also depends on how often he runs into us. Fleeting acquaintances become more sympathetic the more often we see them. The reason, according to friendship psychology: the brain perceives familiar things as rewarding - and that triggers good feelings in us. The exception: if we can't stand a person from the start, it doesn't even help to see them every day.
Looking for confirmation
In general, we feel particularly comfortable with people who support us support, appreciate and respect. The reason is our constant need for security and self-affirmation. We like to look for this in men too - however, there is a separate psychology for friendship between men and women. As Billy Crystal stated in the movie "Harry & Sally": "Men and women can never be just friends. The sex is always between them.“He may be right about that. Because there are actually various studies that confirm this.
We choose differently with age
It is quite normal for us to have more friends when we are young. We are independent, we are looking for orientation and have more free time. When the first children arrive, we like to spend our time with other mothers. Old friendships may fall asleep, but new ones emerge. The older we get, the less psychology plays a role in friendship: It is more important to us that our friend is not just a sympathetic companion, but a real ally. Pursuing common hobbies, having good conversations, going on vacation together ... At 50 plus we no longer waste our time with nice acquaintances, but instead devote ourselves increasingly to the people who are us really care.
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